Two Man Couch is Back!

After a three month hiatus Two Man Couch is back!

A lot has happened since we last posted.  In a minute I will post my thoughts about the LeBron special and his signing with the Heat.  At the bottom of this post you will find a link to an old NFL Draft Preview Podcast that never got posted (but it’s good stuff).  For now, these are the top sports stories in my mind, since April:

1. LeBron signs with Miami–teams with Wade and Bosh to form greatest 1-2-3 NBA has ever seen.

2. Lakers repeat as NBA Champions over Celtics.

3. Successful World Cup in South Africa: Donovan’s Algeria goal is moment of the tournament.

4. 2.95 Perfect Games in less than 3 weeks.

5. Even outside of the LeBron saga, NBA free agency summer of 2010: tons of interesting and engrossing stories with major plot twists.

6. Stephen Strasburg absolutely lives up to the hype.

7. NFL Collective Bargaining Issues drastically impact NFL free agency.

8. Tie: Chicago Blackhawks win Stanley Cup and Tim Tebow is the story of the NFL Draft.

The following link will take you to our NFL Draft Preview Podcast that we did with the DraftCzar Matt Miller in late April.  It never got posted but we think it is by far our best and most professional podcast yet so you should check it out!

http://hotfile.com/dl/53553177/dd62d06/01_Two_Man_Couch_4_19_10.m4a.html

The Final Four and Big Ben’s Big Problem

Green and Tone discuss the Final Four.  Also, their good friend Luker stops by to defend the recent actions of Ben Roethlisberger.

http://www.mediafire.com/?g10u4tiydd0

Mock Draft: Part 3

Here is the third quarter of the ‘Two Man Couch’ mock draft.  The rest to come tomorrow night.  Enjoy!

16.  Tennessee – Derrick Morgan, DE, Georgia Tech

After losing Kyle Vanden Bosch and with Jevon Kearse a free agent (and near the end of the road), defensive end has gone from one of the Titans’ strengths to their biggest weakness.  They would be thrilled to get Morgan, the best traditional defensive end in the draft.  Morgan is a solid all-around talent and one of the top ten prospects in this draft; he is also the best player available right now.

17.  San Francisco – C.J. Spiller, RB, Clemson

Spiller is the most dynamic player in this draft and he is the sort of player who can step in and contribute immediately.  Spiller brings a lot to the table: he provides a change-of-pace for Frank Gore, he can catch passes out of the backfield or in the slot, and he is also an incredibly explosive return man.  The comparisons to Chris Johnson may be a bit premature, but he could definitely do for the 49ers what Reggie Bush did for the Saints this season.

18.  Pittsburgh – Mike Iupati, G, Idaho

Most scouts have Iupati rated as the top interior lineman in this class.  The Steelers’ offensive line has been one of their biggest weaknesses recently and keeping that lothario quarterback of theirs on his feet has to be a priority.  Iupati is an excellent run blocker with great size and strength, but he needs to work on his technique, as quick defensive tackles (such as the ones at the top of this draft) will be able to expose his inconsistencies.  Iupati is raw but he has a lot of upside and could be a pro-bowl caliber guard down the road.

19.  Atlanta – Everson Griffen, DE, USC

Griffen is a solid 4-3 end.  He is good against both the pass and the run.  He has excellent size and showed some versatility playing as both a 4-3 end and a 3-4 OLB last year for USC.  He also has exceptional strength and is a great power-rusher with the potential to consistently reach double-digit sacks.  Defensive end is a major need for the Falcons as Jamaal Anderson has never reached his first-round billing.  Need and value match up with this pick, though Carlos Dunlap or Brandon Graham could also be an options here.

20.  Houston – Kyle Wilson, CB, Boise State

Dunta Robinson is off to the Falcons and if the Texans want to have any chance at stopping Peyton Manning and the Colts, they won’t be able to waste any time finding his replacement.  Wilson is the clear-cut number two corner in this draft and all of his measurables are between solid and very good.  He can also help out in the return game—he had some serious highlight-reel kick returns during his career at Boise State.

21.  Cincinnati – Taylor Mays, S, USC

Mays very well could be gone by this point (and he would have been last year, had he declared) but safety is a need for the Bengals and Mays has more upside than any safety in the history of the NFL draft.  If he’s here, they should take him.  Concerns about his ability to cover are exaggerated, and if for some reason his coverage proves inadequate, he has more than enough size, strength, and tackling prowess to become a pro-bowl outside linebacker.  That’s why I think he should be a top ten pick.  If he plays well at safety, then your team has a freak athlete playing in its secondary.  If not, your team has a freak athlete playing outside linebacker.  I just don’t see any scenario that a player like Mays doesn’t succeed as a pro—assuming his coaching staff knows how to utilize his strengths and minimize the effects of his weaknesses.  Did I mention that he’s 6’3”, weighs 230, and runs a 4.30 40? (He also broke my ankle in high school but not before I caught a ball over the middle on him).

22.  New England – Jermaine Gresham, TE, Oklahoma

Gresham is an extremely gifted receiving tight end in the Kellen Winslow mold, complete with the durability concerns.  He would have been drafted earlier had he left Oklahoma last year before a knee injury during training camp cost him his season.  Because of that bad luck, Bill Belichick and the Patriots get an absolute bargain here and, with questions surrounding Wes Welker’s recovery from knee surgery, Gresham gives Tom Brady another much needed weapon as the Patriots try to make a few more title runs before their window closes for good.

23.  Green Bay – Brandon Graham, DE/OLB, Michigan

Aaron Kampman struggled to adapt to Dom Capers’ 3-4 defense last year and left for Jacksonville in free agency.  Count on the Packers to look for his replacement in the draft.  Graham is a gifted pass rusher who led the nation in tackles for loss last season and is primed to make the switch to 3-4 OLB.  Graham is slightly undersized at 6’1” but he makes up for it with his athleticism and freak strength.  He could be a future sack machine.

24.  Philadelphia – Maurkice Pouncey, C/G, Florida

The temperamental Shawn Andrews is out, which means Philly needs to find some help on their interior line.  Pouncey is smart and versatile, and while not a true mauler like Iupati, he is an above average run and pass blocker.  He’s a good fit and value at this point in the draft because he can play three positions.

Two Part March Madness Pod

Green and Tone get together to discuss the best four days of the sports year.

Part 1: http://www.mediafire.com/?zjmmjmzgi3j

Part 2: http://www.mediafire.com/?zmwiwitvoqy

Monster March Madness Podcast Tomorrow

Tony and I will be doing at least two hours on the NCAA tournament tomorrow.  Get ready for an exciting, info-packed podcast. The Pod should be up sometime tomorrow evening.

Mock Draft: Part 2

Here is more of the mock–the second half of the first round to come shortly!

9. Buffalo – Jimmy Clausen, QB, Notre Dame

This pick will almost assuredly be either a quarterback or an offensive tackle.  The Trent Edwards experiment is over—the guy is nothing more than a career backup.  Clausen is the most pro-ready quarterback in this draft, having played under supposed offensive guru Charlie Weis for three years at Notre Dame, where he played in a pro-style offense, operating almost exclusively under center.  By comparison, Bradford who played in a spread offense, operated mostly out of the shotgun.  If the Bills think Clausen can be their starting quarterback of the future, he represents great value here at the bottom of the top 10.

10. Jacksonville – Joe Haden, CB, Florida

While Haden didn’t run particularly well at the combine, his talent is impossible to overlook: he is clearly the best corner in this class.  The Jaguars secondary was atrocious last season, giving up the sixth most passing yards and passing touchdowns.  Haden has great instincts, good ball skills, and, most importantly, is an excellent cover-guy.  He can step in and start immediately, filling both a need and a premier position.

11. Denver – Dan Williams, DT, Tennessee

Williams is the only true 3-4-nose tackle worthy of this high a selection.  If the Broncos want to continue the improvement they made last season, they will need to upgrade the interior of their defensive line.  The nose tackle is the linchpin of the 3-4 defense and Williams represents right balance of positional need and value at this point in the draft.

12. Miami – Jason Pierre-Paul, DE/OLB, South Florida

Pierre-Paul has been shooting up draft boards recently as his performance after he became a starter at the mid-point of the season for South Florida was extremely impressive.  He is a bit of an unknown commodity at this point as there isn’t much tape on him and his motor is a bit inconsistent but his talent is unquestionable.  A major question still remains: can you really spend a top pick on a player who couldn’t earn much playing time at a relatively unremarkable college program?  Either way, Bill Parcells will be looking for a DeMarcus Ware-type to build his Miami 3-4 around, and you can bet that if he sees a bit of Ware in Pierre-Paul, he will be the pick.

13. San Francisco – Anthony Davis, OT, Rutgers

The 49ers need to address the right tackle position and Davis seems as if he is a good enough athlete to play either tackle position in the NFL.  Davis is a behemoth, at 6-5 and 323 lbs, though his athleticism and work ethic were thrown into question at the combine.  Regardless, the 49ers need help on the offensive line, and Davis represents the best value around.

14. Seattle – Bryan Bulaga, OT, Iowa

There is no question the Seahawks need to address their offensive line, especially with the many questions surrounding Walter Jones’ retirement and Sean Locklear’s health.  Bulaga is a blue-collar type—a high-motor, relentless run blocker with good size and pass protection skills.  He would represent great value here for the Seahawks, assuming he isn’t snatched up by one of the tackle-starved teams in the top ten.

15. New York Giants – Rolando McClain, ILB, Alabama

McClain has long been considered the best inside linebacker prospect in this class and it would be a major coup for Jerry Reese if he were to fall to the middle part of the first round.  Reese can thank the Dolphins for addressing their needs for an inside ‘backer by signing Karlos Dansby instead of taking McClain, a tackling machine with incredible instincts and a great nose for the ball, though he failed to impress by running a 4.71 40 at his pro day.  Nonetheless, he’s the best player available at this point, and he plays a position the Giants need lots of help at, after they jettisoned Antonio Pierce in the offseason.

Two Man Couch Mock Draft

With the 2010 NFL draft in the not-too-distant future, we at Two Man Couch felt it would be appropriate to try our hand at a little mock draft.  I’ll be unspooling five to ten picks a day over the course of the rest of the week.  Feel free to comment with any thoughts/gripes/beef that you have with any of the picks.  Lets get the ball rolling…

1.  St. Louis – Sam Bradford, QB, Oklahoma

Unless the Rams are able to make a trade for a franchise quarterback they will take the best one in the 2010 class.  In my opinion that’s Sam Bradford, who may be the most accurate quarterback prospect since Peyton Manning.  Justifying paying number one money to either of the elite defensive tackles will be difficult considering the Rams unsettled quarterback situation.  As long as Bradford’s shoulder checks out and he confirms his ability to make every throw at his pro-day, he will be the first player selected.

2.  Detroit – Russell Okung, OT, Oklahoma St.

Many people believe that the Lions will definitely take Ndamukong Suh if the Rams pass him up.  However, they just invested 26 million in defensive end Kyle Vanden Bosch and traded for defensive tackle Corey Williams and with major needs elsewhere, I’m not sure they can justify spending that much money on their defensive line.  Having already invested 78 million in Matthew Stafford, the Lions absolutely have to protect that investment by getting him a blind side protector.  Okung is huge, strong, and athletic.  Left tackle is also a premium position in the NFL, and while needs in the secondary could have the Lions looking at Eric Berry, their money will be better spent on a position that consistently commands one of the highest salaries in the league.

3.  Tampa Bay – Ndamukong Suh, DT, Nebraska

Tampa will be thrilled to see the top prospect in the draft fall to them at the third pick.  Tampa’s defenses of old were built on the principle of generating pressure with their defensive tackles and there certainly isn’t a better defensive tackle in the draft than Suh.

4.  Washington – Eric Berry, S, Tennessee

Berry isn’t the sexiest pick at this spot but he definitely makes the most sense.  With Laron Landry bordering on bust territory and no other defensive backs of note on their roster, the Redskins need to address their secondary.  Berry has constantly been compared to Ed Reed, had a fantastic career at Tennessee, and put together the most impressive combine of any defensive back, and maybe any player, in this draft class.  With Okung and Bradford gone, Berry is the pick.

5.  Kansas City – Trent Williams, OT, Oklahoma

Kansas City wishes Russell Okung were available here but settles for the player who outperformed him at the combine in Trent Williams.  Williams showed incredible athleticism and quickness at the combine, running a 4.88 40—good for second among offensive linemen.  His combine showing confirmed his ability to play left tackle in the NFL, as some scouts wondered if he wouldn’t be better suited to play on the right.  The selection of Williams allows the Chiefs to move Branden Albert to right tackle or guard, giving them tons of flexibility along the offensive line.

6.  Seattle – Gerald McCoy, DT, Oklahoma

This pick is a slam-dunk for the Seahawks.  If an elite talent like McCoy is on the board, you can bet that they will pass up the opportunity to draft Jimmy Clausen to take him.  However, if the Seahawks are serious about moving to a 3-4, they would probably take Clausen, as McCoy is really only suited to play the 3-technique position in a 4-3 scheme, in which his quickness and pass rushing ability would be best utilized.

7.  Cleveland – Dez Bryant, WR, Oklahoma St.

After trading away Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow and losing Donte Stallworth, the Browns have hardly any weapons on offense outside of Joshua Cribbs, who really isn’t an every down player anyway.  Mohamed Massaquoi had a nice rookie season for the Browns but he really isn’t a number one option.  Mike Holmgren has shown that he isn’t afraid to take a receiver in the top ten (he took Koren Robinson 9^th overall in 2001) and Dez Bryant is far and away the top receiving threat on the board.  Bryant is a big target with above-average speed, excellent leaping ability, and great hands.  He is a future star in the NFL.

8.  Oakland – Bruce Campbell, OT, Maryland

Everyone and their mother have the Raiders taking Campbell with this pick.  I say why not?  He showed that he is a physical freak at the combine, posting 34 repetitions in the bench press with 36-inch arms, a 32-inch vertical jump, and a time of 4.85 seconds in the 40—the fastest time by a tackle.  While his motor and technique were very inconsistent at Maryland, that won’t stop undead Al Davis from pulling the trigger.  Perhaps Al will surprise everyone and draft coherently, but I refuse to bet on that until he proves me wrong.  I wouldn’t be surprised if he took Taylor Mays here either—that is, if he didn’t secretly die of a heart attack after watching Mays’ combine.

That’s all for now… More to come tomorrow!

2010 Oscar Preview: Shea Dishes Out His Picks

‘Two Man Couch’ contributor Shea Velling stops by to preview the 2010 Academy Awards.  Look for Shea to jump on a podcast, live from China, sometime in the near future.  Until then we hope you enjoy the thoughts of the controversial and often hilarious Sheabird.

Best Picture

What will happen:  Avatar wins in the expanded Best Picture department.  It is a huge crowd pleaser that doubles as a very good (but not great) film, but what guarantees it victory is the movie’s revolutionary impact on 3-D technology, which some are already likening to The Wizard of Oz’s popularization of color.  From now on, people will expect all big budget blockbuster-type movies to be in 3-D (get ready for Transformers 3: Megan Fox’s 3-D Breasts, coming Summer 2011!).  This will go a long way towards curbing the piracy and/or home viewing of the industry’s most profitable efforts, at least until we can watch Avatar or Batman 3-D: Meet Heath Ledger’s Avatar at home or on our laptops with no drop-off in our viewing experience.  Expect the Academy to give its highest seal of approval to the protection of Hollywood’s bottom line.

What could happen:  An Iraq War drama that is actually good, The Hurt Locker, wins in what is a tough political climate for Democrats.  Last time Steve Martin hosted the show, Michael Moore was booed off the stage for Bush bashing.  This time around I think the Hollywood Demobamas might want apologize for that move.

What I still can’t believe happened:  The Blind Side was my biggest cinematic let down of the year.  I really liked the book and how it blended football history with a moving story which, much like the works of Clayton Bigsby, made me proud to be white.  I really disliked the movie, which was essentially a Disney sports drama starring the increasingly plastic-looking Sandra Bullock, who must retain about 3% of the face we saw in Speed.  Seriously, this movie gets a nomination and Star Trek didn’t?  I guess revenge is a dish best served as cold as the Academy’s love for my favorite movie of 2009.

Best Director

What will happen:  James Cameron wins for Avatar.  Cameron handled every single aspect of this movie personally and his Raymond Babbitt-like attention to detail is apparent from start to finish.  No director was more important to their film than Cameron was to his.  One thing working against Big Game James is that he is a world-class douchebag who is motivated primarily by a desire to show up the Canadian rednecks he went to high school with (I am not making this up, read the Dec. 2009 Rolling Stone profile of him).  Still in a town full of assholes, Cameron is unquestionably the most successful at the box office.

What could happen:  Kathryn Bigelow wins for The Hurt Locker as Tiger-hating female voters stick it to Bigelow’s douchebag ex-husband James Cameron.

What can’t happen:  Tim Burton can’t win for Alice in Wonderland, which was pushed back from a 2009 release.  The thought of seeing the world’s most overrated director (yeah, I said it) and his creepy wife (Helena Bonham Carter) in eccentric outfits watching the show from the audience while engaged in a circle jerk with Johnny Depp (himself no slouch in the overrated department) is enough to make me want to skip the whole thing and just watch Star Trek again.

Best Actor

What will happen:  Jeff Bridges gets the Oscar for Crazy Heart.  Great actor meets gritty character.  Done.  Game over.  Still, I have one gripe with this: the part of Bad Blake is what great actors must refer to as a layup.  Now I love Bridges (who else could carry both Tron and The Big Lebowski?), but I believe it is written in the Los Angles town charter that anytime an actor gains weight to play an alcoholic who has a May-September romance while singing his own songs in a movie we won’t remember 3 years from now, said actor is to win the Best Actor award.

What could happen:  Hollywood’s Favorite Son and heir to the throne of Cary Grant, George Clooney, gets the nod as Up in the Air’s Ryan Bingham.  Everyone says this movie is “Clooney being Clooney.”  I say “bring back Clooney being Batman.”

What won’t happen:  Sorry Morgan Freeman, you could not have been more misused in Invictus.  Ideally you would have had a very limited but extremely high impact appearance and pulled an Anthony Hopkins, who won this award despite only having 24 minutes of screen time in The Silence of the Lambs.

Best Actress

What will happen:  Meryl Streep wins for her performance as Julia Child in Julie & Julia.  She totally carries an otherwise terrible movie (Amy Adams anyone?) with a Jamie-Foxx-in-Ray total character immersion.  Also, Streep is the consensus best actress alive and yet she hasn’t won an Oscar since 1982.  Expect the Academy to go out of its way to change this.

What could happen:  2010-Gabourey Sidibe wins Best Actress.  2011-Sidibe makes a romantic comedy with Chris Brown that 37 people pay to see.  2012-Obama campaigns in black communities with “the star of Precious, Gabourey Sidibe!” as White America collectively says “Oh, check it out, it’s Precious.”  2017-Get In My Belly!: the Gabourey Sidibe/Vern Troyer Sex Tape is released.

What I wish would happen:  Carrey Mulligan wins for An Education.  She was fantastic in a role that has her pulling dangerously close to Emma Watson for the top spot in my “Don’t Worry, She’s Actually Legal” Rankings (and relegating another promising newcomer, Modern Family’s Sarah Hyland, to 3^rd).

Best Supporting Actor

What will happen:  Christopher Waltz wins as Colonel Hans Landa in Inglourious Basterds.  This one has seemingly already been handed out and I have no problem with that.  I also stopped caring who wins this award after Gandalf lost it to Jim Broadbent as Jack Haley in the unforgettable motion picture epic Iris.

What could happen:  Woody Harrelson wins for The Messenger.  The Iraq War has three chances to win an important Academy Award and with the Pandora War boxing it out in both Best Picture and Best Director, the son of the guy who killed Kennedy could soon be taking his statue to a left-wing rally near you.

What probably won’t happen:  Stanley Tucci is on the outside looking in for his performance as the murderer next door in The Lovely Bones.  Still, that movie was supposed to be a major player in this awards season and Tucci is the only guy who got out of it alive (look for Mark Wahlberg to resurface in 2015’s The Departed 2: Thicker Accents, co-starring Ray Allen as Officer Jesus Shuttlesworth).  Also, anybody who didn’t see Peter Jackson, master of massive, computer generated epics, blowing a moving family drama, please turn in your guns and badges.

Best Supporting Actress

What will happen:  Whoever wins this award will almost certainly never be heard from again (remember Jennifer Hudson, Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones?).  Fortunately Mo’Nique (Precious and BET’s The Mo’Nique Show) is well positioned to pull a Whoopie Goldberg and go on to a long career hosting a crappy talk show for women.  One blemish on Mo’Nique’s Oscar resume is her refusal to take a hiatus from her show to promote her performance.  I can’t think of a worse award season strategy that doesn’t involve releasing Norbit.

What could happen:  Vera Farmiga wins for Up in the Air.  I believe America is finally ready to forgive her for her Departed accent.  Still Anna Kendrick’s being nominated in this the same category will cost her votes as the anti-Mo’Nique camp decides which FOWC (Female Onscreen With Clooney) they like better.

What I won’t let happen: I don’t want to live in a world where Maggie Gyllenhaal has an Academy Award.  I hate actors who have “indie-cred” or love from the film festival crowds and Gyllenhaal has a ton of both.  She was the third worst part of The Dark Knight (trailing only the killing off of Two-Face before he got his own turn as the main villain and “Where is he!?!”)  I’d take the actress formerly known as Katie Holmes playing wet-blanket love interest Rachel Dawes over Gyllenhall, hands down.  Now that is saying something.

Note from ‘Two Man Couch’: The thoughts and opinions of Shea in no way reflect the views of the principle contributors of ‘Two Man Couch,’ however, we felt censoring his column would not be in the spirit of protecting the First Amendment of the United States Constitution.

Say What You Want About LT But Don’t Call Him Fake

After seeing Ladainian Tomlinson, who, in case you forgot, was the most dominant running back since Barry Sanders (yes, he was better than Emmitt Smith), break down during his farewell press conference, the thing that resonated with me the most was how much he cares about his team.  People have called LT a lot of things in recent years, but the one thing you can’t say about him is that he doesn’t care about his teammates, fans, or the game of football.  His teary goodbye to the city of San Diego shouldn’t have been particularly noteworthy but it really stood out because so many professional athletes in this day and age are simply out of sync with the people who make their jobs (and lifestyles) possible.  As professional sports have become more and more riddled with selfish, greedy headcases and malcontents who think the rules of society don’t apply to them, I will remember LT not only for his on the field accomplishments, but also because he was a real class act.  Criticize him for sulking during big games or for taking losses too hard, but the fact of the matter is that LT simply doesn’t care what people think about him.  The guy has a ton of heart and I wish I still had my old powder blue LT jersey so that I could rock it one last time (by the way, that jersey is in the pantheon of the coolest jerseys of all time, along with the original Vince Carter Raptors jersey, the blue Sixers Iverson jersey, and, of course, the new Seahawks lime green alternate jerseys).  I doubt his career is over–he did have 12 touchdowns last year–but its sad that he won’t get to retire with the organization that made him a hall of famer and that he single handedly turned around.

Green

Two Part NBA Trade Deadline Podcast

2/22/2010: http://www.mediafire.com/?tdhnmtnmyyw (part one) – The guys discuss the NBA trade deadline and the free agent class of the summer of 2010.

2/22/2010: http://www.mediafire.com/?ny3noh3tzmr (part two) – The guys discuss the art of sports broadcasting and make some NBA playoff predictions.